Stop listening to yourself. Start talking to yourself.

Yes, I know it has been a long time since my last post. So, let me apologize now and then move on. Sorry. Ok, so life has been up and down here lately for me. Happy. Sad. Worried. Confused. Excited. It's been an emotional roller coaster. And "NO" I am not pregnant. I am just going through some growing pains. At least this is what I am going to call it. I think that you are never too old to experience growing pains. Life changes as you get older and you have to learn how to change as well and cope with things. It doesn't stop after your teenage years and I don't believe it stops after you go over the hill and turn 50. I believe that life is constantly changing and sometimes we have to learn how to adapt to our lives as things change and constantly work harder to become the best that we can be. Now, am I good at this? Well that is a good question. I am learning that being a grown-up, and getting older, is not the easiest thing in life. It’s a great experience and the ride is nice, full of adventure. It’s just that I have a lot to learn in life and I still haven't quite fit into my big girl pants yet. I still have some room to grow before they fit perfectly. But I am learning. I just need to try harder and work harder to be the best that I can be. And strive hard to be the woman that God has created to me. So, with all of that said. Here is a quote that I came across today and wanted to share with you.

Quote by D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones:

“Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself? Take those thoughts that come to you the moment you wake up in the morning. You have not originated them but they are talking to you, they bring back the problems of yesterday, etc. Somebody is talking. Who is talking to you? Your self is talking to you. Now this man’s treatment [in Psalm 42] was this: instead of allowing this self to talk to him, he starts talking to himself. “Why art thou cast down, O my soul?” he asks. His soul had been depressing him, crushing him. So he stands up and says, “Self, listen for moment, I will speak to you.”

I heard about this quote while watching a sermon by John Piper tonight. He was using it as an example in his sermon about how we need to start preaching to ourselves more. I realized that I am a person that listens to myself way too much. Especially about missing the US and missing my family and how things are difficult here and this and that and more. No wonder sometimes my life is like a roller coaster ride. I need to stop listening to myself and start preaching to myself and say "Hey self, today is going to be a good day." or "Self, I know you miss your family but you will see them soon." I think this is something that we all need to do more in life. I know that for me, if I did this I would probably have less days of crying and more days of smiling.

Another thing that would help is to start listening more to what God has to say, than listening to ourselves. Memorizing scriptures and saying them out loud to ourselves every day.  Making time for Him every day, rather than making time to watch our favorite TV show. Praying more and listening more to the Holy Spirit, rather than praying real fast every day and not sitting still to wait and hear what He has to say. I can't tell you how many sermons that I have heard over the past few months that have all been about how we need to pray more. Pray. Pray. Pray. This is so important and I think it is something that we don't make enough time for. I know I don't.

Ok, I think I better stop here before I get on another topic and start writing like crazy. But throughout this next week, join me in my challenge. Stop listening to yourself and start talking to yourself. Pray more. Memorize scripture. Have hope and fight the good fight.

P.S. A great new song that I heard is "Good Fight" by Unspoken. I am going to post a video with the lyrics on the side of my blog under my profile picture. Take time to listen to this encouraging song. May God bless you and be with you.

For Mom....

I got a request from my lovely Mom to write on my blog during my free time. And I agree it has been a long time since I wrote something. So, here is a brief update on life here.

As you probably all know, I am starting to miss my family, and sweet home Alabama. I think it is mostly because of the holidays and the fact that it has been about a year since I went to the US. But life is good here in Brasil too. We received a lot of rain during the week of Thanksgiving, and that was something that we all were very thankful for. We have been living in a time of drought for the past few months. So every drop of rain is truly a blessing.

I have a new hair style now. It's summer over here and so it was time for a cut. Which, is another thing that is definitely weird. With it being Christmas time and the month of December, I am still not use to this hot weather and not being able to have the joy of sitting by a fire because it's cold. There are some things that I don't ever get use to and this is one of them. All of my life, I grew up with cold weather at Christmas time. So sweating and having to drink lots of water, does not compare to being able to wear boots and layers of clothes while drinking hot chocolate. This is something that I definitely miss.

But enough with all the things that I am missing, and longing for right now. I am trying to learn how to be content and this month I am trying to keep the focus on Christ. Joao and I started a new tradition for the month of December. We are reading a scripture passage together every night (in English and in Portuguese) and listening to a Christmas hymn. I found the reading plan on the Bible app and it is called "Rediscovering the Christmas Season" so if you want to go check it out, I encourage you to do so. It has truly been a blessing for both of us and I am looking forward to tonight, to read the Word and see what God reveals to us. This time has been a great reminder of what Christmas is all about, and how we should celebrate the birth of Christ.

So to end this blog post, I want to encourage you all to take time this month and remember the whole purpose of why God sent His only son to be born in a manger one holy night. It wasn't just all about the cute little baby, that Jesus was when He was born, it was more than that. It was about the Man that He became and the sacrifice that He made for all of us when He died on that cross for our sins. This is LOVE!! And this is the love that we should be celebrating this Christmas season!! Enjoy spending time with your family and friends this season, but remember to stop and take time to reflect this season. Pray together. Read the Bible together. Thank the Father for sending His precious Son Jesus to be born, so that we can have life and experience a relationship with Him.

P.S. Here is a picture of us... just in case you miss seeing our smiling faces.(:

Only in Brasil... and much MORE.

I think I could write a book about things that only happen in Brasil. Sometimes when I get frustrated about something I say, "only in Brasil." But I don't want to write a negative post on my blog about all the things that frustrate me because that would be no fun to read and besides I really like Brasil and every day that passes this beautiful place feels more and more like home to me. But lets talk about life here, just so you have an idea of things that happen here and some things that are a little different from Sweet Home Alabama.

Here is a list of some things that only happen in Brasil:

1. Right now you can get a fine if you have the water hose outside of your garage and in the street, in order to wash your sidewalk. It is forbidden right now because of the lack of water and if some one sees you they can call the police and give you a big fine. They are saying that you can wash down the garage and the outside of your house, but you don't need to wash the sidewalk outside. They are wanting to save the water because it is getting low. Pray for some rain here because we are needing it. (P.S. I was a rebel yesterday and washed the sidewalk down with the water hose. There were people passing by and saw me, but thankfully I didn't get a fine. I didn't know about this new rule, until Joao told me that afternoon. I just thought it was that you couldn't wash your car outside, because this is another thing that you can't do right now.. haha. "Oh well," I told him, "I already did. Now it's clean.")

2. In the morning there are these loud trucks that pass by everyday and play music. They announce that they are selling gas. Imagine a very loud intercom system that you can hear from a very long distance and as it gets closer to your house it just gets louder and louder. "Gas, gas," it says, "buy your gas today and you will get a present in return." This truck usually comes around 9 but sometimes earlier too. Then on certain days there is people selling cheese and other things. So it's the same thing, "cheese, cheese, we have all kinds of cheese." And then there is this one truck that comes by and only has this melody playing over and over again. I am not sure what he sells but the melody is more like an alarm clock going off or an alert sound, and not a pretty music playing. So it is kind of impossible to sleep in late. But it can be a good alarm clock. If you are in bed and you want to know what time it is. You will know that it is close to 9 if the gas truck is passing by. (Ha.. and at this very moment as I am typing, a truck just passed talking about something. And it is 12 in the afternoon, so it shows you that they come at all times of the day.)

3. You can pass by people if there is a crowded place or something and there is no need to say, "excuse me." Here in Brasil, people are very close to each other and very friendly. So if you are in a supermarket and you bump into someone and they see you and you see them, its okay. If it was an accident then of course you would say, "I'm sorry." But if there is just a lot of people there and everyone is pushing through, its okay. The personal bubble here is not as big as it is for the people in the US. Normally if you did this in US, you would be saying,"excuse me," the whole way as you are passing through people. And I think that is because we are thinking "your in my bubble" or "your in my personal space." But people are so friendly here in Brasil and things like this doesn't bother them. (This is one thing that I love about Brasil. It is very rare to meet a person who doesn't say hello or doesn't treat you like you're their best friend.)

4. The birds poop on everything. Your sidewalk. Your car. Your freshly washed clothes. Your walls outside. And the list could go on. If you like birds then you will find many of them here. They wake me up a lot outside my window fighting and singing loudly. This is probably when they are pooping on my clothes that are hanging to dry. Trust me, it is no fun to go and take your clothes off the line and then realize that you have to wash some of them again because the birds poop on them. (This just happened the other day on my nice dress pants. Joao saw it and said, "what is this?" There was two big white stains. No fun.)

And the list could go on and on, but I am going to stop at number 4 and save the book for another day. Even if there are little things that are very different from US, I still love it here. The people are so friendly. The food is very good. Family is very important and you are very close to everyone; and you see the family several times a week. Life seems to be more carefree and laid back here. There is not a lot of worries here, unless I create them (which I do sometimes). But life is good here and I love my job more and more each day. I love being a teacher. I love watching my students learn something new and grow each day. Being a teacher is definitely a reward, even if it requires a lot of preparing for class and studying all the material. I find that I am learning a lot of things, just like the students.

One thing that I have been wanting to write on my blog, but just haven't made the time to is about being satisfied. Ever since I went to the Philippines, my life changed. I will never forget that summer and how much of an impact it had on my life. I remember coming home and feeling lost in the US. At times I didn't want to be there and I wanted to be back in the Philippines. I felt out of place and like I wasn't able to do my part, as far as serving the Lord and being a missionary. It was a very strange time for me and took months of adjusting. Then later I got engaged to Joao, and was planning to move to Brasil. So, I really became unsatisfied with life in US and I was ready to move as soon as possible to Brasil. And mainly this was because of being so far from my handsome Joao. I wanted to get married fast and live that happily ever after life. Then when I got to Brasil, I was good for a couple of months and then I was missing US and all of my family there. Again, I felt that feeling of being unsatisfied. I prayed a lot during that time and asked God for help, and he blessed me with a lot of jobs that I am so grateful for. It got me out of the house, and allowed me to be busy and feel that I found a place to fit in. A couple of months after all the newness went away, the feeling came back. Finally, after praying to God again, the Lord spoke to me. He told me that I am never going to be satisfied on this earth and that this is not my real home (my eternity home) and that this was just a temporary home. It made sense and it was a good reminder of something that I already knew. And I am still seeking Him for direction in my life and learning new things about Him daily.  Just the other day as I was reading a book by Francis Chan and doing some reflection, God revealed something to me that amazed me. It was something so simple and something I already knew, but when we see things from a different angle it sometimes makes more sense to us and it is way deeper than we ever imagined.

Also, throughout my praying and seeking God, I learned that I was more focused on life on earth and living for the world than I was living for God and looking forward to my future home in heaven. I think this is something that we all struggle with on a daily basis. We can get so caught up in worldly things and so focused on our life here on earth, that we forget about the fact that one day, as believers of Jesus Christ, we will be spending eternity in heaven. I was watching some videos of John Piper a couple of weeks ago on his book, "Don't Waste Your Life"and he talks about a poem by C.T. Studd called "Only One Life." I encourage you to go look it up online and read it. The line that stands out the most, and that is repeated over and over in the poem is this, "Only one life, 'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last." I now have this printed out and posted on my refrigerator and also I made it into a bookmark and put it in my bible. I think it is a good reminder that we need to be reminded of every day. We only need to be focus on our life in Christ and what we are doing to bring glory and honor to Him. He is the reason we live. 

Well, I think I have made up for the many months that I failed to write on my blog. I am sure you will have plenty to read now and a better update on life here. God is still blessing Joao and I and we are thankful for all our friends and family there in US. Continue to pray for us that God will use us here in Brasil for His glory and that He will give us wisdom and direction for what lies ahead. We love you all and miss you all very much. Sending you hugs and kisses from Brasil. May the Lord bless you and your family. Always look to Him for guidance and always know that He never changes. Even while this world changes daily, even while we move to different places, and even while we get different jobs, our God never changes. His unfailing love and mercy is always there. He is the same today, yesterday, and tomorrow. He might be the only constant thing in your changing life, but know that He is the greatest and the most worthy of all our praise. Thank you Jesus for who you are!!!

I'm still alive... in case you were wondering.

Busy. Busy. Busy. That is the one word that describes my life right now. Work is keeping me busy right now; and all though I do get tired some days, I am still very blessed to have a job. I am actually doing my lesson plans right now and correcting English papers, but I needed a short break and so I thought I would share some words with you. Some encouraging words.. just like K-Love says,"And now for the encouraging word for the day." Yes, I am listening to K-Love radio here in Brasil. I listen live on the Internet every morning now while I drink my coffee and get ready for the job.

So here is some scripture that I read in church this past Sunday and how God spoke to me. It was funny because I received a totally different message than what the Pastor was preaching about, but God was speaking to me and He gave me the message that I needed to hear.

These are the words God spoke against King of Assyria... the story of Hezekiah...

"Have you not heard? Long ago I ordained it. In the days of old I planned it; now I have brought it to pass.." Isaiah 37: 26

"But I know where you are and when you come and go and how you rage against me." Isaiah 37: 28

Our God is an all knowing God. He knows everything about us and He has written the story of our life. Everything was planned and ordained long before we were born. How amazing is that? The power of our Lord is amazing and there are no words to describe how amazing He is. God is in control. Trust and have faith in Him. Watch Him as He is at work in your life. He has planned everything and knows every detail about our lives, the next step, our future, our thoughts, and our actions. If you want more detail about just how ALL knowing HE is... Read Psalm 139.

Life as a teacher..

The work of a teacher never ends. I work all afternoon at the school teaching the classes, and then I work all night and the next morning preparing the classes for the next day, then start teaching in the afternoon again and the cycle just keeps going. When Friday comes, my day off, I work around the house and do all the duties of a wife. Clean house, wash clothes, and then I find a little time to rest and watch a couple of TV shows for relaxation (the English shows of course.. like Cake Boss and Supernanny). And that is life for me right now, but it's a good life. I am still so happy and blessed that I have a job. The feeling of waking up and knowing that people that are counting on me (the sense of responsibility) is rewarding. There are times when I am so tired and I don't want to prepare classes, but I just keep pushing on and know that it will get easier soon.

The two subjects that I am having difficulty with right now are, Economics and Government. I think this is because I didn't really like having to take these subjects in High School. Therefore, teaching them has been a little bit challenging. But I love a challenge. It makes you stronger and you can learn a lot from it. So being a teacher is good. I think I am learning a lot, just like the students are. Although, I have the great advantage of not having to do all the required assignments and final tests.

Today is another working day for me. I am preparing for my classes, so that I don't have to stay up late every night next week. But today, I get to work in a very interesting environment. Joao is finishing up his Masters program for school and he has classes all day on Saturdays. So, today he had to go to a city that is about an hour away from home and I decided to join him. I really didn't want to stay at home by myself and miss him all day, so I told him I would take all of my school stuff and be studying while he has classes. And I must admit, I am getting a lot done in the time that I am here. I have no distractions, like I would at home, and the environment of being at a college reminds me of my years at Mississippi College.

The college is beautiful. The floor is full of mosaic tiles and there are tons of columns and archways throughout the building. It almost has a little bit of a French atmosphere, with little tables and chairs that you could find at a cafe in France and stained glass windows on the grand entrance doors. There is even a small little balcony space by the stairs were you can go and sit and look down at the busy street and see the buildings surrounding you. I told Joao as we were walking through the streets to go eat lunch, as I saw all the old historical buildings, that I felt like we were in another place. There is so much of an artsy look here and I am enjoying the adventure of being here. And the little bit of time that I have had with Joao for lunch and the small breaks in between class is great. A whole lot better than having to go a whole entire day without him. What can I say? He is my sweetheart and being with him makes me happy.

And that's all the news I have for now. Other than the fact that the pretty flower that I was telling you about last week, is now dying. It has made me kinda sad because I was enjoying the violets when I would wash my dishes. Now, I guess I will have to buy a new one or maybe I can ask my father-in-law to help me bring it back to life. I don't think it is completely dead; but then again, I don't know much about gardening and taking care of plants.. haha. I hope all is well with my readers and that you are having a blessed weekend. Until next time.

Love -V

There is a "first" for everything...

First time to ride the bus by myself. First time to be a teacher. First week of teaching. First time to teach Brazilian students. First time to eat lunch in a school cafeteria as the teacher and not the student.  And the list could go on and on. As you can see this week involved a lot of "first" things for me. But I think that's what made it so interesting and kept be going throughout the week. I will admit that it has been a very busy and tiring week, but definitely a good one.

I now have a deeper appreciation for teachers and all the hard work they put into each class. Its been a lot of work behind the computer this week, making PowerPoint slides, researching materials, finding videos and pictures to show, and finding anything that might help make the class a little more interesting and fun. And then of course I have been doing a lot of reading for each class. But I found out this week that I love my new job. It requires a lot of hard work on my part, but it is very rewarding at the end of the day when you see your students smiling and having a good time in the class. I love to see my student's face when they understand what we are talking about, and when they get the right answers to the questions that we discuss in class. It's great! I already had one student come up and tell me how much she is enjoying the class and that she really likes the high school program. This is what gives me motivation. I can't fail the students. They have a lot to learn and I am now the one responsible for teaching them all the things they need to know.

So yes there was a lot of nerves at the beginning of this week, and a lot of "first" times for this and that. But I can say that overall, it was a very blessed week. I am learning new things every day and becoming more confident of my life here in Brasil. Just the other day as I was riding the bus home, I realized how much this place is starting to feel like a real home for me. I am so thankful that God has blessed me with a great job here and that I am beginning to feel more independent, responsible, and needed again. Which is a very good thing, because I was getting tired of staying around the house all day by myself. It is good to have a purpose and feel successful in life. God is good, and I praise HIM for the peace and strength that HE continues to give me.

And one more thing.... I bought some pretty violets the other day, and I put them right outside my window seal in the kitchen. I am enjoying taking care of the beautiful flower and watching it grow, as it produces new buds and then slowing blooms to its full potential. I love the beauty of God's nature and how even through a simple flower we can see His Love and His Greatness.

Love,
Victoria (the new teacher)

Day by Day...

Life has been passing by, day after day and yet so fast. Somehow I forgot that I started a blog and should be posting new things about my journey/adventure here in Brasil. I start my new job next week. I will be a teacher at a local high school, where I will be teaching, in English, the AP honor courses that I took when I was in high school. This is an advance program for the Brazilian students here. They are required to take a test, and pass, in order to enter into the program. It is an extra curriculum besides there regular school, and is taught in the afternoon. I am very excited about this opportunity to be a teacher, but at the same time, I am very lost at what exactly I should do. I didn't major in Education. I majored in Social Work. However, I think this is going to be quite an adventure and like someone told me here, "God wouldn't have given you this job, if He didn't know that you were capable of doing it."

Hard work is beginning to have a new meaning here in Brasil. Being a housewife, getting a new job and keeping the old job I already had, is beginning to sound a little overwhelming to me. I mean keeping the house clean, washing clothes, ironing clothes, and all the rest a common housewife does is one job in itself. It's just now that I get the whole thing about what women say about laundry. About how she spends a whole day washing clothes and then wakes up the next day and finds a basket full of clothes. And to think right now that it is just Joao and I. How will it be when we have kids? The laundry never stops. Although, I think it might be the process of washing clothes here that makes things a little different. There is the washing of the clothes, the hanging to dry, the ironing and then putting the clothes away. I usually can do the washing and hanging to dry very well, but then all of the dry clothes gets puts in a big pile on the bed in the second bedroom, waiting to be ironed. (And yes the clothes have to be ironed because they get so stiff after they have been on the line to dry). Its a little more simple in US, when everyone uses the dryer and then simply folds the nice warm clothes and puts them in the drawer. I am not complaining though and if I wanted a dryer, I could go buy one because they do have one here. However, I am blending in with the culture here and I want to get the full experience. I like it too. I am learning a lot about what hard work is all about and how things were before we had all the high technology.

But back to being a teacher. I am going to be the teacher at the high school, and I will also be keeping my other job as an English teacher to small children at an English school. So two jobs, means twice the fun... right?? Not to mention that I have several people ask my husband if his "wife" would be willing to give private English lessons to their child or for themselves. What can I say?? God has truly been blessing me and definitely has answered prayers of uncertainty back in the very beginning when I had no clue what I would be able to do here or what job I could get. Praise Him! He is always faithful and has been so good to me. Now, I am seeking His wisdom and guidance, as I learn how to be a teacher. Which is something I have never done before, and definitely lack experience in.

So, I am going to just take a deep breath, say a lot of prayers, keep drinking my coffee (which is what I am doing now), and know that God is with me each step of the way. It was just the other day that I had a very sweet moment, where God spoke to me. A lady who lives next door to Joao's parents house, invited me to sit next to her on the bench outside her home. This bench is right under a shade tree and it blocks the sun a little so that it is not too hot. This lady is very sweet and a friend of the family. When she asked me to sit with her, I got a little nervous because it is hard for me to carry on conversations in Portuguese. I am getting there, but I don't quite understand everything just yet. But I sat down and visited with her for a while. We didn't say too much, but it was the sweet company she gave to me. She showed the birds to me as they landed in trees nearby and she talked about the garden that belongs to the neighbor across the street. Then at moments we would just sit in silence for a couple of seconds and watch the movements on the street. At that moment, I saw the beautiful nature that God has created and saw how much I needed to just stop and remember Him. Which reminds me of the verse "Be still and know that I am God." Sometimes in life, instead of rushing through things so quickly, and either anticipating or worrying about the next week or month or whatever life may bring, we just need to take it day by day, moment by moment and let God have His way.

Love, V